I just heard that a friend of mine was already separated from her husband. They got married 2 years ago and don't have kids yet. They were in a relationship of more than a decade, before marriage. I have heard a lot of stories that are so similar with this. Wherein a man and a woman who are in a long term relationship suddenly went separate ways after a few months/years of being husband/wife. For some, they separated after being engaged.
It also happened to me in 2008. I almost got married after almost 7 years of being bf/gf. Though it was for the better because we're much happier now with our partners.
With this thought, it makes me think why do couples suddenly changed after marriage? It gives me a phobia and I sometimes feel like I don't want to get married for it may happen to me as well. Though IM NOT afraid because I can easily move on, of course with my age I want to stay with the person I am with, forever. If we're not meant to be, I will understand God. Right now, I just want to understand why there are lots of similar cases like this one so I can avoid the unnecessary things.
What are the factors? Hmmm maybe the first time of living together is one? Because it's really different when you're NOT living together and just bf/gf for many years. When you start living together, you get to see each other's flaws more often for you will be together 24/7. When you lived separate houses, you still get a chance to miss each other. You can still hide some of your flaws.
Hmmm what else? Budget issues? In-laws issues?
In my case 9 years ago, it could be because of fate. Do you believe in fate? I do.
No matter what's the reason, I believe that love is not enough to make a marriage work. There should be trust, respect, commitment, time, compromise, sweetness, and physical contact from time to time.
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